Mother's Day is fast approaching. I think about my step children - this is a difficult day for them. They lost their Mom two months after I lost my Mom. I was so much luckier. I was in my fifties and my stepdaughter was 17. I don't think it matters how old you are the pain is still there and you feel cheated that the time has been all used up.
I was very close to my mother and still miss her so much. I miss her laughter, her courage and her love. There are still times, I don't want to be the adult, I just really want my Mom.
Writing helps me reconnect with my memories and helps me see where I am. It helps me heal. As I think back on past Mother's Days - I remember flowers, lavender soap, Baskin Robbins Ice Cream Cake. Feeding the ducks at the local park. Most of all I remember the laughter.
Showing posts with label writing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label writing. Show all posts
Friday, May 7, 2010
Friday, March 12, 2010
A Slice of Life
Memories - funny, sad, bittersweet, they all swirl together as I remember my mother. I tried to have everyone who took care of Mom keep a daily journal. They usually wrote down what she ate how her day went what her moods were when she took her meds. Sometimes when I was lucky some of the funny things that happened.
I wish now I had known more about keeping journals. Had more experience and knew more about writing than I did. I never knew what to say. Mom's caregivers would ask what I wanted. At the time I wanted to make sure everyone knew what was going on. I wanted a record of how Mom was doing.
Sometimes I felt such a deep grief. I couldn't bare to poke at the pain and examine it. I was afraid that I would lose control. Other times I just felt overwhelmed and I didn't know where to start. I didn't think I could do anymore than what I was already doing.
I was reading a couple of blogs the other day that got me thinking. The first one is the Two Writing Teachers Blog , they have issued a challenge to all their readers to write a "Slice Of Life Story" everyday for the month of March. I started late but believe it is a great challenge. I would encourage everyone to accept the challenge and discover your own insights.
In accepting my "Slice of Life" challenge I decided to focus on the here and now and to try and explore the funny perspective of my life now. I have been writing some brief entries about our newest puppy at gather.com. The first entry is Lost and Found.
I wish i had accepted a challenge like this while I was still caring for my mother.
I wish now I had known more about keeping journals. Had more experience and knew more about writing than I did. I never knew what to say. Mom's caregivers would ask what I wanted. At the time I wanted to make sure everyone knew what was going on. I wanted a record of how Mom was doing.
Sometimes I felt such a deep grief. I couldn't bare to poke at the pain and examine it. I was afraid that I would lose control. Other times I just felt overwhelmed and I didn't know where to start. I didn't think I could do anymore than what I was already doing.
I was reading a couple of blogs the other day that got me thinking. The first one is the Two Writing Teachers Blog , they have issued a challenge to all their readers to write a "Slice Of Life Story" everyday for the month of March. I started late but believe it is a great challenge. I would encourage everyone to accept the challenge and discover your own insights.
In accepting my "Slice of Life" challenge I decided to focus on the here and now and to try and explore the funny perspective of my life now. I have been writing some brief entries about our newest puppy at gather.com. The first entry is Lost and Found.
I wish i had accepted a challenge like this while I was still caring for my mother.
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